11.2.26

Before we need insight, advice, perspective, or regulation, many of us need attunement: someone to recognize that an emotional situation is having an emotional impact on us, and that our response makes sense.

11.1.26

A self-led life does not mean my protective parts disappear. I still have parts that want to please, control, fix, withdraw, overthink, defend, or make everything okay.

I am learning to notice when they take over, understand what they are protecting, and give myself a little more choice about what happens next. 

10.31.26

We do not need to be afraid every time anxiety shows up. Anxiety is something our bodies know how to do.

The practice is learning when there is actually something to respond to and when we simply need to give the feeling some time to settle.

10.30.26

Being kind does not require being endlessly available.

Being loving does not require ignoring your limits.

Being a good person does not require saying yes when every part of you is quietly saying, “This does not work for me.”

10.29.26

Hard things happening is not evidence that you are doing life wrong. Hard things happen because this is a human life. We get to learn how to grieve, recover, adjust, ask for help, rest when we need to and begin again when we are ready.

10.28.26

We talk a lot about learning to tolerate hard feelings, and I think sometimes we also have to learn to tolerate feeling good.

Ease can feel unfamiliar. Joy can make us want to look over our shoulder.

I am practicing letting a good moment simply be a good moment.

10.27.26

I think presence is one of the most spiritual things we can practice. 

We stop leaving ourselves for the future and return to the life that is happening now.

 There is so much we miss when we are always mentally somewhere else.

10.26.26

There is effort required to live a life. We have to care for our bodies, manage relationships, make hard choices, deal with disappointment and adjust when things do not go as planned.

Denying that reality does not make life easier, and learning to accept life on life's terms does make life easier.

10.25.26

Some of us learned that taking care of ourselves meant disappointing someone else. So self-care can still feel strangely “mean.”

Your needs do not become selfish simply because someone else would prefer you ignore them.

10.24.26

Sometimes life is simply a lot. 

Several difficult things happen at once, none of them are easily fixed, and our nervous system begins to feel as though it is carrying more than one person should have to hold.